Thinking About Reflecting....Reflecting On Thinking

I've been thinking about reflecting lately. I don't mean by that that I have been considering the prospect of doing some reflecting. No. Actually, I have been thinking about the distinction between the two concepts. There is a difference worth noting in my view.

Now I didn't just decide to think about reflecting. The issue kind of invaded me and called for attention as a result of discussions with two clients in the same proximate time frame.

One of the clients had actually worked with us a couple of years ago, but decided to arrange a meeting to brief his new boss on his continuing developmental focus. As I reviewed his file in preparation for the meeting, I came across notes from one of my coaching sessions. We had discussed the value of slowing down and processing his experiences for meaning. The value in doing so would allow him to become more strategic; take a broader view, and see things in context. This client was a great thinker, but had discovered that he had some work to do in order to become a competent reflector. He was all about action and problem solving in the here and now. He had, and has, a great business mind capable of getting short-term business results. And isn't that what shareholders, and Boards, senior management and compassionate, visionary Wall Street have all been demanding?

The second incidence calling up the same issue occurred during some assessment work we were doing with a hard charging, high potential executive. This young man exudes high-octane energy. He shared that his mind is always engaged; always"clicking" through things where ever he is and what ever he is doing. It's never at rest. The problem is that his mind is engaged in fast paced thinking activity that never goes deep. Speed may help a wide receiver be effective at "going deep" on a football field, but speed and intensity are often counterproductive when we attempt to go deep in our mind.

It's like driving a car. The faster we go, the less we see. Our vision is blurred as we pass by the landscape so quickly. The deer at the edge of the woods will merely blend into the tree line, and not be seen at all.

I am choosing to distinguish between thinking and reflecting simply for the purpose of delineating differences between two appropriate, but distinctly different ways of using the incredible gift of our mind. Thinking is critical to our survival, but it doesn't necessarily distinguish us from other creatures that are quite adept at problem solving. Have you ever observed a squirrel, for example, in it's own cunning way figure out how to get at the bird seed in a feeder you so cleverly thought you made squirrel proof?! Squirrels are incredibly creative problem solvers, often outwitting their human adversary. But squirrels don't have the capacity to reflect; to put things in their broader context, and to sort out matters of and for their significance; for their meaning.

Reflection, on the other hand, creates an opportunity for understanding the underlying themes and context of events as they unfold around us. Reflection allows us to "go deep." In his book Leadership From The Inside Out Kevin Cashman, a mentor and friend (and oh yes, employer) addresses this matter when he observes: As we go within, the power of thought is greater. Just as atomic levels are more powerful than molecular levels, our deeper levels of thought have more energy and power. It's the third law of thermodynamics. As activity decreases, order increases. As the mind settles down it becomes more orderly, more able to comprehend and handle difficult challenges.

Reflection and speed and intensity are antithetical. You can't be reflective without slowing your mind, and body down to a level which allows your spirit to emerge. Spirit, when I looked it up in my thesaurus, revealed these telling synonyms among others: essence, substance, and vision. It is my growing hypothesis that reflection is the passageway to spirit, and spirit is the gateway to a more profound way of looking at life. Speed and intensity are about being alive. Reflection is about being awake.

In my essay on Magic Moments earlier this year I quoted a few lines from one of my favorite Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan movies, Joe Versus The Volcano. They bear directly on this topic of being awake, and I want to share them again with you.

Tom and Meg are at sea in a fine sailboat that is taking him to his encounter with the volcano. Tom (Joe Banks) observes to Meg (Patricia), his sailboat captain: "Life is unbelievable to me." To which she responds:"My father says that almost the whole world is asleep: everybody you know; everybody you see; everybody you talk to. He says that only a few people are awake and they live in a state of constant, total amazement."

Having become intrigued by this line of thinking I did some very top line research on the topic. I came across some really interesting corroborative information. (It's a real hoot for me to find that an "ordinary Joe's" independent findings are actually validated by an expert or two. The joy of individual discovery is so much more meaningful than simply learning first through reading or someone telling me how things are.).

What I call "reflection" other writers have referred to as "mindfulness", "simply noticing," and "heartfulness." Let me give you a snippet of background on each of these related terms.

I came across "mindfulness "in Time Shifting, a book written by Stephan Rechtschaffen. He says, The word is a bit confusing. It does not refer to living only in the mind, or analyzing everything, or staying in mental time. It means conscious awareness of the present, using all of our faculties, all of our senses - being aware of what's going on around us and within us as well. The more we learn to pay attention on a daily basis, the more we are able to bring true awareness to everything we do. The difference is that here the learning process involves slowing down first and emptying ourselves of busyness, to allow ourselves to "do nothing," despite the inclination to resist the notion at all cost.

In Taming Your Gremlin Richard D. Carson distinguishes between "thinking about" and "simply noticing." He says "Thinking about" and "simply noticing" are very different processes. "Thinking about" is the preferred activity of your gremlin and the product of your gremlin's uptightness about not being able to completely understand and control you and the universe. "Simply noticing" on the other hand is what happens when you experience yourself and your surroundings without inputs from your gremlin. When you are thinking about, you are anything but creative. Simply noticing is the first and most important step in the gremlin taming process. Let us call your ability to simply notice your "Awareness."

Oh, and you should probably know how Carson describes your "gremlin." He says, Your gremlin is the narrator in your head He has influenced you since you came into this world and he accompanies you throughout this entire existence. He tells you who and how you are, and he defines and interprets your every experience. The gremlin clouds our mind, befuddles us with distractions and minutia, and stifles our attempts to be reflective.

Then, lastly, there's the concept of "heartfulness" as described in Paul Pearsall's The Pleasure Prescription. Pearsall suggests that scientific findings in the field of (get ready for a big word) psychoneurocardiology show .... that the heart actually thinks, feels, and functions in the body much as the brain does. The premise of his discourse is that we need to listen to our heart as much as our brain. And we can do that only if we are still. "Be still my heart" has more than romantic implications it seems.

So anyway, where am I going with all of this? Trying to make and remake a point, I guess. And that would be that quality in our life, in our relationships, in our decisions, in our perspective, and ultimately in our leadership is all predicated upon slowing down our minds. The irony, is that if we can do that, we will become more effective, more productive, and grow in wisdom.

Just because I am able to reflect and write about topics like this doesn't mean I have figured it all out. It's nearly impossible to always be in a reflective mode. Frankly, daily life calls upon us to be thinkers if we are going to survive. But we can go there, to that reflective place, much more often than we do. It just takes practice and patience to develop the habit and skill. People who "knew me when" would be dumbfounded to think I could ever go there. "Back then" I was a classic human doing preoccupied with thinking, problem solving, and fire fighting. Fortunately, the nature of my work today, and the environment within which I do it, have provided a context for more reflective thought. I suspect also, that the process of maturing has naturally caused me to be more of a seeker of meaning, truth and wisdom. But I am convinced that the opportunity for greater reflection is available to all of us if only we would choose it. You can gain the qualitative benefit of reflection without having to wait for the "old rockin chair to get ya."

What are some ways of slowing your mind? Meditation works for a lot of people, though it’s a rocky transition for some. Yoga and TaiChi are often suggested as well. An "easier" practice is "journaling," either at the beginning or end of a day. End of day works best for me personally. Then there is photography. What an excellent way to stop and pay attention to the time detail of a photographic subject, be it a leaf, a bird, a flower, a cloud. . . . .

There is an interesting quote I came upon in my reading. It is attributed to Theodore Roethke, a Pulitzer Prize winning author and poet. He said, "A mind too active is no mind at all." Reflect on that. Don't think about it. Think you can?!

Regards,
Joe